The only woman in space wants a sex change to make it with a robot.

Firstly, I wanted to say that I'm magical now. I am officially registered for POTTERMORE and my username is Leviosakey155, I'm a little bit more than regular excited about this.

ANYWAYS
I went to Stranger than Fiction (STF) tonight, and it was awesome. They do this long form game which is a rumble and fight to the death. This probably makes no sense if you haven't seen it, and I'm kind of horrible at explaining things, especially improv things. This rumble took place in space, and included space water, gravity boots, and a robot that only cared about military status and ranking, but somehow ended up being re-programmed to be gay, and the only woman left in space toward the end of the rumble wanted a sex changed preformed by Stephen Hawking so that the robot would love/ have sex with her.

Honestly, that's pretty much par for the course at Stranger than Fiction shows.

In health news, today was like a 6 in dizziness, but a 8 in raptor noise anxiety.

Did I tell you about the raptor? I don't think I did, I have an anxiety disorder that causes me to make a noise very similar to the raptors in the Jurassic Park movies, which has also been described as an eagle noise. It's kind of annoying, and happens pretty much all the time, especially at work and extra at STF. Today, however, it was extra bad because there was a thunder storm, and I was rather dizzy so I was freaking out about that. I have way too many health issues at the moment. *eye roll*

I have added everyone on the list to my subscriptions and I look forward to reading your blogs for the next 30 days. :) Happy BEDA everyone.

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because a gravity boot is like a glass, except it's a boot.

Books read: 12
Currently reading: Prisoner of Azkaban

Hello August!

Hi, fellow BEDA writers, welcome to August.

I promise to go through all the people on the BEDA list and follow their blogs, but today that's kind of too much for me. I have vertigo (it basically means I'm constantly dizzy which sucks about 300x worse than you're thinking it does) which right now is really horrible and making it very difficult to sit up, let alone type, so I apologize for the shortness of this post.

I look forward to reading the blogs of the people I met through this last year, and meeting new bloggers.

I'm going to do a quick introduction like thing, if you have any questions or just want to know anything about me, leave a comment and I will get back to you tomorrow.

Who are you?
I am Deanna, I'm 24, and I currently live in Southern New Hampshire

Why are you doing this?
Maureen Johnson told me do, and frankly, I do everything Maureen tells me to do.

Why will I be reading for the next 31 days?
I blog mostly about my life, which is boring, very boring. Unlike last year, however, I have friends now! and a job! so my life isn't quite as boring, but there is only so much I can tell you about the inter-workings of being a Walmart cashier.

My manager is an interesting person, however, so expect to hear about him a lot.

I will also probably, depending on what everyone else does, post meme's and such to keep it interesting.

Also on Tuesdays I go to an improv show, only, if you are a regular reader of the blog you'll understand this, there will be a lot less talking about Jake Ryan, because Jake Ryan is a jerkface with an apparently secret girlfriend, but on Tuesdays expect excitement about improv and on Wednesdays expect hand spams of what happened the night before.

Hogwarts House:
I am a Slytherin.

Anything else?
At the end of my blog I always have a "how many books I've read this year" and a "currently reading" as well as a "why today was awesome". I'm really far behind my goal for reading this year, mostly due to work, being sick, and my work schedule... I also end every blog post with the phrase "AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY" because I love John Irving novels.

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because glaring at my Manager is just as effective, if not more, than talking to him.

Books read: *cough* 11 *cough
Currently reading: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

Because Maggie Asked

Maggie said...

I think you can manage it. What have you considered in terms of jobs? What type of thing do you want to be doing? (Besides writing novels, of course. I already know you like doing that. XD)

I get asked this a lot, like, everyday, mostly in the form of "You have an English degree? Why aren't you teaching?" The only time it wasn't phrased that way was when I was asked by my High School English teacher, because if I ever became a teacher, he'd be the first person to die of shock, I'm legitimately that socially awkward and afraid of people. So I'm going to answer it, in blog form.

In the summer of 2009, I worked as an intern for the safety department of a big company, my basic job was to re-write the safety procedures and other such things, and I was pretty much the personal assistant of the head of the safety department. It was awesome. 

I would LOVE to do something along those lines again. Writing, being in an office, not standing at a cash register all day, having a normal 9-5 or 7-3 or whatever. I even enjoyed being the assistant. It was new, different, I actually looked forward to going to work. I would live to work for that company again, seriously, if I got that chance I would jump on it.

At this point, honestly, I'd settle for an office like job where I wasn't required to wear blue all day everyday.

I hope that made sense. Ideally, in 10 years I see myself being a sane version of Maureen Johnson. 

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY.

Oh, also I've decided to jump on the BOW 11 train, so you can expect more unquality, rambling, obnoxious blog posts for THIS GUY!

Today is awesome because my room is unbelievably organized right now.

Books read -1. currently still reading The Book Thief.

Book Blog part 3

Part 3 of my book blog. I hope I can get someone to pick up one of these books. ALSO if you have any recommendations for next years challenge, send them my way. I LOVE reading books that other people love. 

A Prayer of Owen Meany – John Irving

I’ve read this book 6 times now. It changed my life once, and I keep reading it to remind me of what Owen Meany means to me, what Owen Meany did for me. When I’m feeling lost or sad I re-read Owen Meany. I literally carry a copy with me everywhere. This book means more to me that I can explain. It’s kind of religious by kind of I mean a lot, and the opening chapter is the most boring chapter you will ever read in your life (it’s a lot of historical information and stuff like that mixed in with the story) but if you can get though that, read this book.

If I Stay – Gayle Forman

After I read this book I stopped reading for a week or so because I didn’t think that anything could be better than this book. It deals with death and what if you could make the choice to stay here living even though you’ve lost everything or die and be with the ones you love. It’s heart breaking, and really keeps  you guessing as to what the narrator will decide until the last page.

Twenty Boy Summer – Sarah Ockler

I knew after reading the back of this book that it wasn’t going to be one of those silly romance teen books like it sounds. It was really heart wrenching at points. One review on the back cover says “It tears you heart out then sews you back up again.” I think it’s missing the “And then rips it out again and stomps on it for a minute before giving you the healing moment. It is a love story, but also a death story and friendship story.

Skinny – Ibi Kaslik

I wasn’t as pleased with this book as I wanted to be. I’ve read several books dealing with eating disorders in the past and this one didn’t really live up the others. I’ve wanted to read it for a while and I really wanted it to be, like, the most amazing book ever. Maybe I just set my sights to high, but I wasn’t really thrilled with this book.

The Hunger Games, Catching Fire, and Mockingjay – Suzanne Collins

The Hunger Games Trilogy is excellent. If you haven’t read it, read it. It’s not about who Katniss loves but about what Katniss does, it’s great to see a young adult fiction series that deals with everything the Hunger Games deals with , wonderfully written. Highly HIGHLY recommend.

The Book Thief –Markus Zusak 

              I'm still reading this, but unless Mr. Zusak's head exploded two thirds of the way through this                       book, it will be one of my favorites of all time

Book Blog part 2

Part Two of my "Books I read this year" collection.

 13 Reasons Why – Jay Asher

Being someone who has been where the main character was, obviously I didn’t kill myself like she did, but you know, this book spoke so much to me. I don’t think I stopped crying the whole time I read this book. It was wonderful, skillfully written, excellent, excellent story telling. Jay Asher captured those moments, those hard horrible moments so wonderfully. If you’ve ever been depressed or suicidal, or know someone who has, read this book. Honestly this book is the best one I read all year. I can’t say enough about it. Read it.

 Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac - Gabrielle Zevin

I read this one because my roommate read it and said “You’re a writer, something is wrong with this book. What is it?” I think it was a rushed story, it could have been more developed and the ending was weird. The story, oh the story is wonderful, but there could have been a lot more done with it. I think.

Good in Bed - Jennifer Weiner

I picked this one up because I ran out of books to read, and I picked a good one. It’s not about what you’d think by the title. It’s about an overweight lady and who I believe just turned or is about to turn 30 and she broke up with the guy she thought she was going to marry then finds out she’s pregnant, but there is so much more, that the basics really. It’s deep and emotional. If you’re looking for a grown up book to read, I recommend this one. I don’t read much “regular adult fiction” but if they were all like this book, I would read more of it.

 PS I Love You - Cecelia Ahern

If you’ve seen the movie, but not read the book, you are MISSING OUT. After reading the book, the movie sucked, like, sucked, and I know a lot of people who love that movie. I’m also one of those books are better people anyway, so yeah. The book is so much awesomer though, it more in depth and you cry more, and it’s really great. I like books that make me cry, what I can say. I’m not a big romance reader, but this love story, genius, A+

 Will Grayson, Will Grayson – John Green and David Levithan

John Green, David Levithan, Will Grayson. will grayson. Let’s just say I appreciate the hell out of Tiny Cooper. Nuff said.

 Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by JK Rowling

This was the 2nd time I’d read the series all the way through. The first time was right after DH came out. I wanted to re-read them before the last movies. I could talk forever about Harry Potter and how much it’s changed my life. I believe that everyone who reads any place I post this blog post has read it, but if you haven’t there’s something wrong with you. It’s not just a children’s book. It’s the story that defines our generation. I am a proud member of the Harry Potter Generation.

Along for the Ride – Sarah Dessen

Not my favorite Dessen book, but excellent, per usual. I love her books, I think she’s wonderful her characters, everything. This one deals with step families and love mostly. I’ve mentioned before I’m not really into the whole “Romance” genre but her books are just so well written and well developed that the “romance” side of them isn’t the most important. This book is worth reading if you like her work or that non-angsty Young Adult style.

Dreamland

I know a friend in a similar situation to the main character in this book. I want more than anything to save her, this book, oh this book, shows domestic violence at its worst and tells the reader that there is really nothing we, as outsiders, can do but let it run its course. The psychology and imagery in this book; just read it.

Just Listen

Sarah Dessen does something amazing when she writes. She can take subjects like rape and eating disorders and make them the main focus of a book without focusing soley on that one subject. She’s a brilliant writer. I hope to someday write a book a quarter as good as this one.

Keeping the Moon

This is a good fun book, not one of my favorites, but still just the way Sarah Dessen writes is magical. This book deals with outcasts and “weird people” and what friendship really is.

That Summer

I felt there was something missing from this book, like it could have been longer and more too it, like of like it was rushed, but not really. This was Sarah Dessen’s first novel, and it kind of shows in a way. It’s still really good, but there’s something missing for me

Someone Like You

Teen pregnancy, death,  friendship, a really, really well written book. I wish I had more to say, because it was such a lovely book, but honestly, just read it.

Lock and Key

This was the first book I read by Sarah Dessen, it deals with abandonment, family, changing schools, friendship, love, abuse. Sarah Dessen is, just… just… brilliant.

This Lullaby

The science of the break up, the falling for the guy you never wanted to. I think this is the most “romantic” of the Sarah Dessen books, personally, and I really just loved it.

The Truth about Forever

This is my favorite Sarah Dessen Novel. I can’t really put my finger on why, but if you only read on Sarah Dessen book, I recommend this one the most.

Book Blog part 1

This post is broken into 3 parts because it's 7 MS word pages long. I am posting the next one in a few hours. These posts are the "reviews" of the books I've read this year. I'm kind of horrible at reviewing, but I hope it gets you a little incite into the books, hopefully enough to pick them up if you haven't already. 

Extras – Scott Westerfeld

I read the rest of these books at the end of 2009, and I loved them. Honestly, I think this one fell a little bit short of the other ones, but I still liked it. It was nice to see what happened the Tally after the end of Specials, but I kind of wish it was left as a Trilogy.

Sloppy Firsts Second Helpings Charmed Thirds Fourth Comings Perfect Fifths - Megan McCafferty

This SERIES! The Jessica Darling Series by Megan McCafferty is BRILLIANT! I loved it. I actually drove in a blizzard to Bangor Maine to by the third book I needed to know what happened. I heard of these books through Hayley G Hoover of Youtube/fiveawesomegirls fame. From where I’m sitting, we have fairly similar tastes in books and movies and whatnot, so I figured I’d give it a whirl. They’re more adult than most books I read, but the same themes run through them, romance, friendship, school, college, losing friends, all that fun stuff. I HIGHLY recommend these books.

So Yesterday- Scott Westerfeld

This one was different for me. I really enjoy Scott Westerfeld’s writing, this book was one of my favorites by him. It’s a bit of a mystery, and kind of a short book, so a very quick read. It’s one of those books that makes you think about life a little differently after you read it. I like that in a book

Liar- Justine Larbalestier

I had high expectations for this book and it feel a little short of them. It’s a good book don’t get me wrong, I just wasn’t into the story. It’s about a murder, and a wolf, and a liar. It gets confusing sometimes, and I think if I was more my taste in books than the book itself that kind of turned me off to it.

 Night in Twister River – John Irving

I LOVE John Irving novels, I LOVE THEM. This one is no exception. I think it takes a special kind of reader to like John Irving books, so if you’re read and like Hotel New Hampshire or The World According to Garp then there is a better chance that you’ll like this one than if you don’t. It’s not really for a first time Irving reader I don’t think, because of what the story is actually about when you sit down and think about it afterward. It’s thicker, not just page wise but intensity wise, it took me over two weeks to read it, which considering how quickly I normally read is a turtles pace. It’s deep, but really, really good. I love John Irving. I could write page after page about how much I love John Irving, and this book reminded me of why I love his writing so much. 

 Scarlett Fever- Maureen Johnson

Maureen Johnson is another one of those authors that I don’t think can ever write anything I don’t like. This is the second in the Suite Scarlett series, and personally I liked it better than the first one, more Spencer, I think is the reason of that (I named my cat after Spencer Martin. I love Spencer Martin.). You need to read the first one for this to make sense, but seriously, go rent or buy or borrow all of Maureen’s books right now, and read them. SERIOUSLY.

The 50 book challenge!

If you read this blog, you may have noticed that at the end of each post I keep a tally number of books I've read this year (in making this blog post I discovered the number was wrong, but that's not important). The point of that counting, was to complete the 50 BOOK CHALLENGE! this year, obviously, I feel 11 books sort, but I did read some amazing books this year.

I have written a blog, which is currently 7 MS word pages long talking about these books. So I'm going to post it over the next few days.

This is the list of books that I read this year: (bold means re-read)

1. 1.      Extras – Scott Westerfeld
   2.      Sloppy Firsts- Megan McCafferty
   3.      Second Helpings
   4.       Charmed Thirds
   5.      Fourth Comings
   6.       Perfect Fifths
   7.      So Yesterday- Scott Westerfeld
   8.      Liar- Justine Larbalestier
   9.      Night in Twister River – John Irving. 
   10.   Scarlett Fever- Maureen Johnson
   11.   13 Reasons Why – Jay Asher
   12.  Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac - Gabrielle Zevin
   13.  Good in Bed - Jennifer Weiner
   14.   PS I Love You - Cecelia Ahern
   15.  Will Grayson, Will Grayson – John Green and David Levithan
   16.  Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone- JK Rowling
   17.  Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
   18.   Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
   19.  Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
   20.  Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
   21.  Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
   22.  Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
   23.  Along for the Ride – Sarah Dessen
   24.  Dreamland
   25.  Just Listen
   26.  Keeping the Moon
   27.  That Summer
   28.  Someone Like You
   29.  Lock and Key
   30.  This Lullaby
   31.  The Truth about Forever
   32.  A Prayer of Owen Meany – John Irving
   33.  If I Stay – Gayle Forman
   34.  Twenty Boy Summer – Sarah Ockler
   35.  Skinny – Ibi Kaslik
   36.  The Hunger Games – Suzanne Collins
   37.  Catching Fire
   38.  Mockingjay
   39.  The Book Thief –Markus Zusak
   
   
   AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
   Today is awesome because it's my best friend's birthday. 

This post may make me sound insane.

But how many of my posts make me look not insane? Answer: zero.

Note: this blog may contain Harry Potter Spoilers, so if you don't want to be Spoiled, don't read on.

I was reading the other day, most like on Wikipedia, or some other such credible source, that wizard children aren't required to go to muggle school previous to attending Hogwarts. I've always kind of wondered about this. Mostly because of how Mr. Weasley acts and how pure blooded wizards seem so out of the loop when it comes to muggle things.

Because I'm Deanna, I was thinking about this, and about how my future children with Fred Weasley (*cough* I'm not insane *cough*) or, you know other wizard children, would be raised.

In reading Harry Potter, and mostly seeing Mr. Weasley, I think it may be important for children of wizarding families to have some kind of muggle education. It's up to grade 5 or 6 I believe. I think that it would be good for wizard children to know the basics of the muggle world. I mean, there isn't much purely wizarding world left, really. Well that we know of in 1998. Only certain towns (right?) so most likely wizard children are going to grow up around muggles. Wouldn't it be a good idea to let wizard children and muggle children learn the basics together, then went school starts to get harder and more specialized then you send your kid to Hogwarts, or whatever.

I love Mr. Weasley, but I don't want my children to be like him, you know, all fascinated with the muggle world because they never got to live in it or explore it.

Wow, I'm completely insane.

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because sometime next week there is going to be a SKYPE PARTY!!

Books read 38
Last Finished- MockingJay.
If you haven't read it READ IT

I don't want to see you go

But it's not forever, not forever, and even if it was, you know that I would never let it get me down, cuz your a part of me that makes me better where ever I go. So I will try, not to cry, No one needs to say goodbye. - Days of Summer Team StarKid

I'm really sad that BEDA is over, that this is the last BEDA post of the year. I've said to before, and I have no problem repeating myself when it comes to this, I've really enjoyed reading and commenting and getting to know all of you. It made me feel like I was really a part of something. I haven't felt like I was a part of something in a long time. So thank you, everyone that read my angst filled annoying blog for the past month. Thanks for commenting and listening.

I don't really think I can explain how much it means to know that no matter how ridiculous a post I write, someone will read and comment on it. I'm in that weird part of my life, as I've said before, where I just feel so alone and lost sometimes. To know that someone is there to listen, no matter how stupid that thing I have to say is, really, really means a lot. Thank you guys, I can't really put into words how much I just want to hug all of you.

This is my facebook page if you want to be my friend on there: http://www.facebook.com/Decoolz

I think, I'm probably wrong, but I can think whatever I want, that doing this, being here with you guys has made me a better blogger. I don't feel stupid posting some random thing about how all I did all day was sit around and eat ice cream feeling sorry for myself. I've learned that I have to get out and do something so I can report on it, and honestly, if BEDA didn't turn out to be as awesome as it did, I wouldn't have that mindset. Finding and having adventures saying "Yeah sure I'd love to" when someone asks me to hang out, is something that you guys gave me back. I can't explain how much that means. Thanks for helping me get my life back.

In this month, I've gotten a job and accepted friendship, two of the things that I've been hoping and praying for for almost a year. I love you guys. I really do. Thank you so much for being there.

I'm excited to continue to read your lives and see our next big adventure (NaNoWriMo? Epic Skype party?) But mostly I wish you all well, and I hope that you got a much out of this as I did.

ALSO: In yesterday's post, I said my Skype name was "Decoolz" it's actually "Decoolz27" I'm sure there are hundreds of other Decoolz on Skype, but you know, I should probably tell you that I don't know what I own name is.

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because I've finished packing for Hogwarts!

Books read 37

I am a follower

Everyone else is doing this, so I'm going to as well. I'm really going to miss this everyday blogging. I've had a lot of fun with it. I've enjoyed everyone's blogs and "meeting" new people who I can relate to. You guys have been really awesome, really. Thanks for being interested in my boring angst filled annoying life. I'm kind of sad that tomorrow is the last day. :(

So now some Triva!

Name: Deanna
Age: 23 *cough*old person *cough*

Location: New Hampshire or The Shire if you're awesome, which I am, so The Shire

School: Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardry. (also known as I have graduated from college and now I never have to go to school again.)

Major: I was an English communications major, which is why I currently live with my parents and work at Walmart

Job: Cashier at Walmart, because I DREAM BIG
Current Book: Skinny by Ibi Kaslisk but Thursday MockingJay!

Instrument: my Instrument is MS word or a Pencil

Single: FOREVER ALONE

Hungry: No

Clean: pretty much, I mean I spent the day at WalMart, so I'm covered in Walmart germs, but I showered today

Sick: No, but now I will be that I said I wasn't
Bored: always
Going to miss BEDA: VERY MUCH

Skype Name: decoolz

NaNoWriMo Account: decoolz (also my twitter name, and my tumblr name and my actual name... because I'm creative)

Should everyone add you?: SURE!

Will the Skype party be epic: I feel that it would be. We're pretty awesome, us BEDA-ers

Are you happier now: Yes! Yes I am

Will you type out a thoughtful blog more often: I will write twice a week after Tuesday. I promise
Even AFTER August: I promise

I love You!: Aww. I love you too, BEDA, Lord Voldemort, Neville, cookie dough Ice Cream, and Jake Ryan! *cough* and Michael J. Fox *cough*

I'm really going to miss this. I really am. *cries*


AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because I recently made plans to sit in my friend Kevin's train car on the way to Hogwarts on Wednesday.

Mentioned the books already in this entry, so yea.

Let's do this

I had a plan for this blog, but then I read Kristina's blog today, and I want to copy her. So I'm going to.

BUT FIRST!
I was working today, and this woman and her daughter (aged 5 or 6ish) came through my line, the girl was being kind of whiny and childlike, not overly annoying, but annoying enough. The girl was asking to hold things and stuff and I could tell that the mom was getting really annoyed. This behavior had been going on for most of the store, I guess. The mom was trying to punch in her PIN and the girl started to pull on the ladies coat, and saying "Mommy, I want to press the buttons!" The mother looked down at the little girl and said "Oh My God, Hermione, shut up." The little girl crossed her arms over her chest and pouted.

I almost wet myself and bit the inside of my mouth until it started to bleed, to keep myself from laughing.

The most important part of that story is that there are 5 and 6 year old children in the world named Hermione; and although she may not be named after the character in Harry Potter, I'm just going to assume she is. I hope one day that girl grows up to be the cleverest witch of her age. And that woman, most likely un-knowingly, since she was, like 35, gets to make AVPM references all day, everyday.

Back to copying Kristina Horner:
She wrote about her life 10 years ago. In December, everyone on twitter was talking about what they were like in the year 2000 I sent couple tweets that looked a lot like this: #10yearsago I was 13, had a huge crush on that Lab Tech on CSI, Greg, Fave Song was Pin Ball Wizard by The Who, I had a freakishly large Zac Hanson poster and my favorite movie was Back To The Future, and I couldn't WAIT for Order of the Phoenix
I then sent out a tweet that went something like this: As apposed to know, were Greg is no longer in the Lab, but a real CSI, my Hanson poster contains all three brothers and all the Harry Potter books have been released.  #ImthesamepersonIwaswhenIwas13.

I remember reading the tweets of the people I get to my phone, as we weren't cool enough to have Internet in the apartment. A lot of people were saying things like "Ten years ago I was deciding if I wanted to be in television or become a teacher." (became a teacher, if you were wondering) or "ten years ago I was a cheerleader, now I want to kill all cheerleaders"

I bring this up, because looking back at my life, my interests haven't changed very much. However, I don't think that 13 year old Deanna would like 23 year old Deanna, I also think 13 year old Deanna would call me a nerd and probably kick me, because 13 year old Deanna was a bitch, she was also a nerd, but intolerant of other nerds, because she was the BEST nerd EVER.

I've always been a nerd, and I wore my nerd with pride, unashamed that I was weirder than anyone that had ever existed. (I've decided that this is a fact.) My post it note days were only a year away, but I did carry around little boxes for key chains that played music (Oh the nineties)  I had a B*Witched one and a SClub 7 one is I remember correctly. I also got them taken away a lot, because they would go off at random times. I carried unnecessary things and had a posters of both Michael J Fox and Zac Hanson in my locker.

I was not yet friends with the girl that would lead to my belief that being weird and strange was a bad thing, so I was just out there being me and not caring about it. I kind of miss that kid. My backward baseball cap days. I have a picture of 13 year old me, I'm at a formal, so no hat but here:

I'm the one with the glasses, the other girl is Queen Elizabeth I (inside jokes)

I look exactly the same, well i got new glasses, and I have braces in that picture, but I look exactly the same.

In her blog Kristina talked about how different she was as a young teen, and we're for the purposes of this blog, the same age (I'm a year older than her IRL). I just can't help looking at myself and seeing an nearly identical person. Everyone around me figured I'd grow out of the "Harry Potter thing" I always figured my weird obsession with MJF would eventually fade, but there is now "growing out of Harry Potter" and from where I sit, I can see hanging in my closet this outfit:

without MJF in it, obvs.

Thinking about how we're supposed to "grow up" and change and evolve as people, and seeing that I still love the same things just as passionately, if not MORE passionately than I did when I was 13 makes me wonder if I something is wrong with me. Or maybe there is just something so great about the things I loved when I was a kid, that I never should let go of it.

I don't know, what do you guys think?

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY

Today is awesome because, well, mostly because the inside of my face still hurts from that child being told to shut up.

Books Read 36

Currently have 4 chapters left of Skinny by Ibi Kalisk (I'm usually a much faster reader.)

Is it too early

To hate my job? Yes? okay, well then.

Today, what's the word, umm, oh, sucked. Idk if you guys have ever done Computer Based Learning Modules, but they are, how can I put this, they should go shoot themselves in the face and then die in a hole. ARG. So boring, and so long. At least I was with two other girls that felt the same way, and I will be with them tomorrow, only this time it won't be for 4 hours but for 7. I can't wait...

Our manager, today was his last day. So we have no idea who we report to, or what we're supposed to be doing after we finish the CBLs tomorrow. Oh, because there's more. But at least we know never to pick up human organs off the floor, and that it's against company policy to walk through hazardous waste spills.

WTfuck.


We are so ill informed about our actually jobs it's kind of sad, but whatever, I feel that the two girls I "worked" or to be more accurate got paid $10 an hour to laugh at a computer screen with will end up being tight. It will be like having work friends! And they're my age too, in the same boat as me, college graduates looking for something to pay off those loans. So that cool. I don't feel like the weird creepy old person.

I'm going to stop complaining about my job that I've had for two days now.



AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because NEW SHIRTS!: http://www.annarbortshirtcompany.com/teamstarkid

(ps. when I was leaving for work my Dad said to me: Just remember you work to do the things you want to do, like buy those Star Ranger team jerseys. So close, so close. He tries. My dad only recently discovered that Harry Potter's first name was Harry.)

books read 36
currently reading: skinny by Ibi Kaslisk

It's Sunday of Harry Potter Weekend

I spent yesterday not moving and watching Harry Potter Movies on ABC Family, and making fun of them on Tumblr. Today, I'm doing basically the same thing, only I can, like, sit up and not feel like I'm going to vomit.

Later I'm going to be trying to figure out what I'm going to wear on Tuesday, because Tuesday may be the most important Tuesday of my life. And by important I mean, it's the last Tuesday of the summer and I have to talk to Jake Ryan or I will NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN, until next summer.

When did I become that girl? Oh yeah, when I was 17 and started loving him... I am pathetic. :(

I have nothing else of importance to share with you, so I will leave you with this:

I leave you with this. Spencer and Loakie BFFLS

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
Today is awesome because my tumblr dash is covered with "Hermione is not an OWL"

Books read 36: currently reading Skinny by Ibi Kaslik

Since it was asked, I might as well answer it.

In the comments of yesterday's post, RuthEDay asked a question that I sort of answered in the comments, but I feel that I should address it farther so I'm going to. Basically she asked if the ankle breaking lead to the sucky down turn in my life.

Kind of.

Not that my life was exactly rainbow and clouds and square dancing, previous to my sophomore year of high school, but losing volleyball pretty much cemented my place in the "why the fuck do I even exist" world. I wasn't, like, super good, or anything, but I was good enough, that with practice I could have played in college, and gone to a state school like I wanted. I'd played volleyball from sixth grade until my sophomore year, well I was on the team junior year, but the ankle situation lasted about 10 months longer than it should have, (long story, don't ask) so I didn't get to play that season.

I lost friends, who probably we're really my friends looking back at it, but it was high school, and frankly if you talked to me, FRIEND. Remember John Green's video where he talks about college, and making friends, that person, the one basically crying so that you'd be your friend, that was me in high school/ up until, like, maybe, two weeks ago when I realized I actually had some really good friends who weren't assholes.

Because I didn't have volleyball, I fell into this HOLE OF SAD. My grades tanked and found myself drowning with no way out. I know a lot of people have been there, have felt that, have made their lives better, turned around and clawed toward the light, but there are days, still, when I  feel like that sad kid stuck in that bottomless hole knowing that I'm never going to get out of it. I was one of the lucky ones, though. I was that one in a million kid that had a teacher like Mr. Feeny from Boy Meets World, that one that cares so much about you that they stop you in the hallway to say "see you tomorrow," even when they know they have a teacher's conference in Boston and aren't going to be there the next day. I'm lucky enough to still have that person in my life now, and that I can call this person my friend, even if I can't call him by his first name because it's too weird (I graduated high school 5 years ago, it will always be weird to call teachers by their first names. His first name is Mr. and it will be that way for the rest of my life).

I know that there is a way out of the hole, a way to fix it, but I get so lost in the fact that I've found myself there again, that it spirals out of control again. I feel that if I could go to that moment and run on the outside of the group instead of the inside, and therefore not fall off the sidewalk-less road of my town and break my ankle I'd be better. This is why I re-read A Prayer for Owen Meany this year, so that I could grasp at that piece of seventeen year old me, and hope that somehow twenty-three year old me would get it.

I feel that even changing that small piece of life, I would still be pretty much the same person I am now. I mean there's no doubt in my mind that I would end up a nerdfighter. I've always been a nerdfighter, I'd still be the weird girl that thought it was socially acceptable to wear post it notes as a fashion accessory on my jean jacket (Note to self, this is probably why you had no friends in high school), and I'd still have an unacceptable for someone of my age crush on Michael J Fox, I'd still love Harry Potter, I just won't be so sad all the time, I won't get lost in my own depressing thoughts.

Part of me says that MAYBE if I didn't give that teacher the chance to save me, I wouldn't be where I am. I wouldn't be the biggest fan *cough*facebook stalker *cough* of the improv troupe, since I wouldn't have needed the extra credit in English that compelled me to go to the first show. I may not have found Nerdfighteria as soon as I did, but then again, if I'd gone to a bigger college, may be I would have found it earlier. Maybe I'd be an intern at a magazine or writing somewhere for someone, well on my way to being who I want to be.

I just want to be happy with who I am, I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin, and I just feel that if I wake up and I'm fifteen, I can do that.

AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
today is awesome, because for the first times since... ummm... well... 2007 I have plans on a FRIDAY NIGHT! With a REAL LIFE PERSON! #omg

Books read: 36
currently reading: Skinny by Ibi Kaslik

ANSWERS!!

Today I reveal the untrue fact. I must say that I'm intensely bad at these "pick the untrue thing about me!!" things because, frankly, I've done some really ridiculously weird shit in my life, so my untrue fact maybe be sadly disappointing, and I am sorry.


I have met John and Hank, as well as both of their wives.
TRUE: interesting story, the Paper Towns tour, Boston stop, I sat two seats over from, and talked to the Yeti. I talked to her before I knew she was the Yeti. Secret Brother Tom, made her stand up at one point in the thingy, and there was an audible gasp, and I turned to my friend, who isn't a nerdfighter but agreed to go with me and said "Oh my fucking God I just had like a three minute convo with the Yeti."
I high fived Hank and got to say hello to The Katherine, but The Yeti part was the most amazing thing ever.
BTW she is really, really, ridiculously pretty.

I once stayed at the same hotel as Snoop Dogg

TRUFACT: In Ireland actually, Here is photo graphic evidence:

That's right, I took this, and honestly I didn't really care, but whatevs, other people think it's cool

I met most of the friends I had in college on a trip to the bathroom
TRUFACT I have actually met, probably all the people I know in real life because I had to go to the bathroom. They attacked me, and hugged me, and then we became friends, and now I talk to 2 of them.


I once had a beta fish, Brisco, that lived for 3 years.
UNTRUE: Brisco lived for 4.5 years I got him shortly before I started college. He died, not joking, the last day of classes my senior year of college


I have a drawer full of spoons that I have collected *cough*stole*cough* from various restaurants
TRUEFACT: FILLED. I will take a picture of it to show you if I can get it open

I wear a bracelet on my wrist to signify the love I have for a fictional character who saved my life
TRUEFACT! A Prayer for Owen Meany, saved my life. I can honestly say that if I wasn't assigned to read that book that day, by that teacher, I wouldn't be alive. Owen Meany means so much to my life, that when I will be saving money to get part of the first line tattooed onto my arm so I don't have to wear the worn out ripped faux leather bracelet anymore.


There is rarely a day I don't wish to fall asleep and not wake up at 15 and have a do over
TRUEFACT: Wednesday, meaning, yesterday, was the first time in a while I didn't wish I could just start over at 15. That was the year I broke my ankle, the year life started to seriously suck. I would be in a way different place in my life if I could just re-do fifteen.

I have lived on both coasts of the United States
TRUEFACT: I lived in California until I was 18 months old or something, I don't remember it, but I lived there. My mom has pictures.

Sorry that I suck at this, but it was fun and I loved reading all of your "secrets" getting to know all my fellow BEDA-er's better.


AND THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY
today is awesome because I'm covered in highlighter and red pen, EDITING has started!


books read: 36
currently reading Skinny by Ibi Kaslik